Tuesday, June 22, 2010

22-06-04 -- 22-06-010

it's been a long time i haven't seen your face,
and it seems like i'll never do..
i'm writing to you not to tell you that i still hate you,
just to ask you how you feel,
are you happy out there in this great wide world?
when you lay your head down, how do you sleep at night?
do you even wonder if we're alright?
but me and mom are alright :)
don't ever worry dad,
hope you have all the peace in heaven..

i know, and i really could really realize everything dad,
it's been a long hard road without you by my side.
i DO need you, we DO NEED YOU right here..
me and mom need you right now..
why did you leave us in the night that we cried so hard?
i don't blame you dad, i just want to know,
what was on your mind?
did you think about mommy? did you think about me?
okay, it's an old story and we don't need to talk about that anymore..
you broke my mother's heart, you broke your daughter for life.
it's not okay, but i can make you sure that we're alright..
though without you (:
i remember the day you were a hero in my eyes,
but those are just a long lost memory of mine.
i've spent so many years learning how to survive,
now i'm writing just to let you know that i'm still alive.
for you.

that day,
we spent so cold, so hungry.
we had all the hate to be given to you,
i was so hungry.
but i know mommy didn't had any bucks.
do ya remember dad?
now i'm trying to remind you..
you only left me a scar, a deep deep scar.
mommy tried to give me those f@#kin doctrine,
for me, for me to hate ya.
i'm still a kid, i must take those baby steps to know what the f@#k really happen that day.
but all i remember is Bababh took me away from your hellhouse,
and since that i never see your face anymore.
forget it,
i'll bring these story right to my grave..

and sometimes i forgive,
yeah, and this time i'll admit,
that i miss you,
yes, i do miss you Dad..

like a shattered dreams that i've always pray,
you've gone to heaven without ever say goodbye,
this date dad, right in the day you were born.
June twenty second two thousand and four..
left me here alone, but i should stay home..
saw your face for the last time,
and your creature disappeared by the ground.

me and mommy,
we did, we do, and we will always love you..
though we're far away, i couldn't see you,
i'll never ever touch you, i'll never could hug you..
we will longed for you.

Rest in Peace,
Abdul Firman Jusuf Saad